dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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