hotel room ftw
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
