Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
vagina is talking i cant
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize