fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
