We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
where are you?
Hypothermia
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
