Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I have already put on my inside pants.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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