Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
