We won't sleep together?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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