And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
