so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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