Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
