Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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