The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
