we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
