Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
