Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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