I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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