Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
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