I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
