Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
