just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
