operation have a gay friend backfired
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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