I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize