Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
