I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize
