Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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