C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
