He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize