If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
