I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
