he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Randomize
