Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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