he wants to bone in the snuggie
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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