I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
