Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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