Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
