Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
