i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Randomize
