I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Randomize