my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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