dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
