Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
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