I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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