one might say we're banned from that church
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I party with great urgency now.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
