I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
