weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
