shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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