maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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