Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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