So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
